The Nacissim Epidemic

Author: Jean M. Twenger, Ph.D.
W. Keith Campbell, Ph.D.
Grade:B
Status: Library Book

The subtitle to this book is "Living in the Age of Entitlement" and that pretty well describes what it is about. Today in America, like never before, we encounter people who really do live their lives with the idea that it is all about them. The authors show, through a massive amount of research, just how that has lead to a generation that has poor work ethics, low morals and a growing love of materialism and celebrity. Is America's failing economy directly linked to the "I deserve it all" mentality of the people currently living here? The authors point out that could very well be.

Taking us step by step through the way self-esteem can give way to narcissism and showing us detailed evidence of just what narcissism is the authors show how this growing trend is changing the very reality in which we live. They address all the things which they feel are fueling the epidemic == from cute t-shirts declaring "I'm a little princess" to parents paying for plastic surgery as a high school graduation present; naked or airbrushed pictures on myspace and the reality that much of what we do to stay connected has turned into an opportunity to show off our materialism -- from flashy phones to flashier web pages.

The final chapter deals with what we can do to reverse this trend -- by spending more time teaching community and charity and less time teaching people how to help themselves.

The credibility of this book is very high because of the meticulous research standards utilized. What kept it from being a perfect A for me is that in some ways I felt there was too alarmist a reaction to some what we are doing. I don't think teachers and parents trying to make children feel special and loved is what is behind this so much as the fact that parents often spend more money than time with kids. I also disliked how the current 20-somethings get blamed for their behaviors. If young women are receiving breast implants or nose jobs as graduation gifts (a specific example from the book) is it their fault or their parents? If kids are wanting to work fewer hours for less pay who did they receive the idea to do that from? Much of the behavior complained of can be traced back several generations. I also would have liked to have seen the authors talk more of what has happened as a result of women in the work place. Much of the greed they spoke of has occurred since families discovered two working professionals can own more than one. The subject was hinted at but the authors (one of whom is a working mom) carefully didn't cover it. Much can be said about bad stay at home moms -- growing up I knew several who had their kids outside from 8-5 who handed lunch out the back door-- but I think it is important to look at what exactly affected the changes we see in parenting. Simply blaming it on the kids doesn't work for me.

Overall I would recommend the book. It could help all of us to look at ourselves and ask the question "just how much am I living only for me?"

Tea: I always think of black tea as a serious tea. My favorite advise for making a good pot of tea was from a Scottish lady who ran a tea shop -- a teaspoon per cup plus an extra for the pot.

Enjoy !